I Could Be Sipping Kumquat Wine Right Now

Currently it’s 66 degrees and clear skies in Bradenton, Florida. The forecast says it’ll be a high of 75 degrees today. Why do I care about the weather in Bradenton, Florida? Because it’s 36 degrees here in Seattle right now. And that’s a frickin’ heat wave compared to the below freezing temperatures we’ve had for nearly a week! I was born in Bradenton and lived there until I was 10. My parents foolishly sold our house there, packed us up, and dragged us to farm country in the middle of NO where in Michigan.

My point is, if I still lived in Bradenton, which is about 10 miles from some of the nicest beaches in Florida, I could jump in my car, take a bus or a scooter, and I could be at the beach on the Gulf of Mexico in about 20 minutes or so. I could be stretched out on the powder white sand, feeling the warm sun on my skin, listening to the sounds of the ocean and the seagulls. Okay, I can hear the seagulls here too, but they’re more like white crows here, instead of beach birds. In Florida they cruise around the shoreline looking for marine life. Here, the gulls cruise the parking lots looking for half-full Frosty cups that someone bought from Wendy’s and then decided they didn’t want the rest of it for some reason so they toss it on the ground like the crummy polluter they are and who says Seattle is full of tree huggers anyway because there’s an awful lot of garbage in Seattle? The crows here have stiff competition from the gulls.

I could be at the beach right now. I could inhale the salty ocean air mingled with coconut-scented sunscreen. I could watch tourists walking along the beach picking up shells and playing in the surf and working on their tans.

Or, I could be out in my yard watering my lemon tree like Rita from Dexter. I’d try not to kill the tree though, like Rita always managed to do and then Dexter would have to help her replant it with his little red shovel, but you get my point. I could be picking citrus from trees in MY OWN YARD right now!

My parents have made many, many, many mistakes – some have been doozies – but moving us from the west coast of Florida was a huge one. I could be sipping a mint julep right now, complaining about the snow birds who migrate there every winter, watching my lemon tree grow.

I could be sipping Kumquat wine right now...